Today, I’m going to talk about an extremely important concept.
We’re going to talk about how you should respond to the inevitable disrespect you’re going to experience from women.
People acting in ways that piss you off is inevitable.
You need to have a plan in mind for when these things happen, so that you are not put on your back foot!
Here we go!
Shit Tests
A shit test is when a woman is trying to determine if you’re an alpha badass or not.
She will push on your frame in order to see if you bend.
If you do, you’re done.
If you pass, she will see you as an alpha and her attraction for you will spike.
What I’m talking about today is not shit tests.
What I’m talking about today is disrespect.
Disrespect
Disrespect is any behaviour that you find to be absolutely intolerable.
It is behaviour that makes you cringe internally, or actively pisses you off.
This behaviour is behaviour that must be eliminated if you are to have any kind of enjoyable relationship with a girl.
To disrespectful behaviour, I recommend a withdrawal of attention.
What qualifies as disrespectful behaviour?
Here’s a list:
1) Refusing sex
2) Ordering me to do things
3) Gold-digger behaviours
4) Direct insults to my character or to other women of mine
5) Crying at me
6) Nagging/criticizing my behaviour
If a girl shows me any of the above behaviour, I immediately without argument or explosion withdraw attention.
I tell the girl that it’s time for her to leave, and then I say nothing.
For a week, I cut her off from all contact.
No texts or responses to texts or calls.
She will get the message that what she did is not ok.
Alpha vs Beta Behaviour In Response to Disrespect
Alphas and betas have very different reactions to disrespect.
Betas will often capitulate when their frame is pushed on.
Alphas usually don’t allow their frame to be pushed on.
If you are the kind of man that likes to argue, I’d like to point out that explosion and anger IS attention.
You do NOT want to give a girl attention in response to her disrespecting you.
It is MUCH more effective to ignore and show disdain than it is to explode in anger and try to correct behaviour.
When you try and correct behaviour and explode in anger, you communicate that you care.
Showing her you care is antithetical to the message you’re trying to send, that you won’t tolerate disrespect.
Make sure that you are demonstrating alpha aloofness and not beta caring.
Operant Conditioning
Operant conditioning states that in order to get behaviour you want, you reward behaviour you want to see, and you punish behaviour you don’t want to see.
You can reward by giving the girl something she wants, or taking away something she doesn’t want.
You can punish by giving the girl something she doesn’t want, or taking away something she wants.
I recommend you reward through giving attention (giving her something she wants), and punish by taking away attention (taking away something she wants).
In this way, no money or anger has to be spent needlessly.
Many men see spending money on a girl as a way of rewarding behaviour.
They will buy her nice things and expect her to reciprocate.
By buying a woman nice things, especially early on in your interactions, you are demonstrating beta behaviours.
As a result, her attraction for you will dramatically decrease.
Attention is much more valuable (and cheaper).
Important note: Some women see anger and behaviour correction as ATTENTION, which they LOVE. This means that even though you think you are punishing her when you yell at her, you are actually rewarding her. No woman likes it when you withdraw attention, however. That is why I recommend you use that method.
Attention is the Most Valuable Resource You Have
The thing women want most from you is attention.
It is your most valuable reward and your harshest punishment.
Do not give attention for free!
Only reward attention for behaviour that you want to see.
Take away attention when you’re not seeing behaviour you want.
This is why it is so important for you not to text willy-nilly.
It rewards the girl for just talking to you, something that is not important for men.
Your attention should be focused on other things, and only turned to her when she is giving you what you want (pleasant behaviour and sex, in person).
Why Withdrawing Attention is Effective
Withdrawing attention is effective because the girl knows that she may lose you.
After the first time you have shown her that you are willing to withdraw attention, she will second-guess all of her disrespectful moves, wondering if she might lose you over them.
She then constantly second guesses and questions herself about whether her actions will be met by your approval or not.
When she is constantly trying to win your approval it is amazing for you.
It means you don’t have to work in order for her to want to stay with you.
When you do withdraw attention, she has time to think and think about what she did wrong.
Her fantasy might also go into overdrive as she imagines you being with other women, and her losing her place.
You put the onus on her to chase you.
Obviously, the frame of her chasing you is very powerful.
The Person Who Wins the Relationship Game is the One Who Cares the Least
When you withdraw attention, you also show her you don’t give a damn whether she stays with you or leaves.
You communicate that she’s below you.
You also signal that you have other options.
It is a very strong power play, one that you should use in the event of disrespectful behaviour.
When you signal that you don’t give a damn, she is much more likely to chase you.
As I have mentioned previously, the person who cares the least wins the relationship game.
How Long Should You Withdraw Attention?
Depending on how disrespectful you consider the behaviour you can withdraw attention for longer or shorter periods of time.
For extreme disrespect, you could withdraw attention for four months.
For something mildly disrespectful, it could be as short as a week.
You need to withdraw attention long enough for her to get the message that she might lose you if her behaviour continues this way.
Conclusion
If a girl pisses you off, withdraw attention.
It is a very powerful tactic that encourages the girl to second-guess her disrespect.
When the girl fears she might lose you, you are much more likely to get good behaviour from her.
Try it for yourself and see how it goes!
-Helios
Frequently Asked Questions
I Keep Yelling At My Girlfriend For Being A Bitch, and She Never Stops, What Gives?
Your girlfriend sees yelling at her as attention and she likes it.
You’re better off going cold for a week.
That should work better.
She will fear losing you for showing disrespect.
If she leaves you after you go cold, she just wasn’t that into you.
My Girl Keeps Shit Testing Me, Should I Withdraw Attention?
Shit tests are a natural part of female behaviour.
If they shit tests are incessant, however, it may be time to withdraw attention.
She needs to get the message that she has to relax.
How Do I Apply Operant Conditioning to My Partner?
Reward the behaviours you want to see with attention, punish any behaviour that you consider to be utterly disrespectful by withdrawing attention.
In this way, you encourage her to be pleasant around you and you do not have to deal with her being rude to you otherwise.
What Do Women Want Most From Men?
Attention.
This is why controlling when you show attention is so valuable.
Show attention when she is being kind, pleasant and giving you the sex you want.
Withdraw attention when she is being annoying, bitchy or disrespectful.
You will find that your experience with your partners improves dramatically!
The Helios Blog 